Sunday, July 29, 2007

Men, Sex and Relationships

My sense is that most men seek out relationships for one reason and one reason only: sex. If they were getting sex regularly without being in a relationship, they would never look to be in a real relationship (men: feel free to weigh-in here). There is little doubt in my mind that this is the case. I think that monogamy is unnatural for men. If you asked a man "if you were getting it from multiple partners, would seek out a relationship?", the answer would invariably be "hell no!". I mean, who are we kidding here? Sex is what drives men in selecting a partner(s). Am I wrong? When/if a man finally decides to settle down and get married, the first thing they consider is this: Is this someone I would enjoy sleeping with for the rest of my life?

Ladies, let's not kid ourselves here, to some extent we do it too. But it's different for us. We look at the whole package. We consider his personality, character, appearance, brains, ambition, earning potential, etc... Sex with the guy does not rank first on our list as it does with most men when they seek out a partner. It's amzes me that we ever wind up in relationships at all given that our agendas are so different.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

disagree with you on every point.
men look for a partner.
but a person cultural back ground counts.
in the context you write about men, I can easily say: women are into money, not into love.

kindest

Anonymously yours, said...

I hope you are right!!

Anonymous said...

I mean 'Dutch men' in general...)

Unknown said...

AY:

I know so many succesful women and men, pretty good looking and handsome as well, that when they turn into their forties, suddenly they realise that they want a partner. Especially succesful women find it difficult to find a life-partner.
Will put you on my roll...again..))
Kindest

Anonymously yours, said...

It is sooo difficult, Hans, to find the right partner. So hard, in fact, I sometimes feel like I just want to quit this whole scene. But I keep moving on anyway.

Anonymous said...

Start thinking with your heart, instead with your brains...))
And never give up. But also 'open up'. Take your time to know someone..))
People are beautiful creatures, but still we don't want to see that...
Kindest

Yasemin said...

Dear anonymously yours, I have been following your blog for some time now, but never had the chance to comment. I also agree with Hans that your observation is not correct. I believe that deep in our heart we (men and women alike) all look for a 'partner' that we can share our days with, not only our bed ;-) Some of us are lucky to find that person early in our life, some have to wait a bit longer. But we usually meet him/her when we least expect it. So, my humble advice to you is that you shouldn't panic so much as you seem to be doing and try to live your life, without trying so hard to 'find' him. Let him come to you :-)