Saturday, June 16, 2007

Peter Pan Syndrome

Okay, so I am 41 years old and I have birthday that is fast-approaching. The thought of it makes me ill. You see, I still think of myself as being 25. I don't like this getting older business. I suffer from what I call Peter Pan Syndrome or PPS.

I find that there are many single people like me who still have childish dreams and child-like ways. We act like adults in that we go to work, pay our bills and act fairly responsibly. But we don't wish to get married and settle down. We want to live selfishly. That is something we can't do if we are "tied down". Yes, we are in search of finding a significant other to hang out with. But it pretty much ends there. We don't wish to be married because that would be a real buzz kill.

We like having time on our hands to be self-indulgent and hedonistic. Married people view us as being selfish - and we are. And what is so wrong with that? We don't envy our married friends; we tolerate them and their incredibly dull lives. I think that married people assume that we single people are always looking to get married. Trust me, we are not. I would go so far as to say that we are happier than they are. We are tired of listening to you married folks complaining about your spouse's ways. Honestly, we don't really care. As they say, you made your bed, now lie in it! Stop bringing us down.

26 comments:

Unknown said...

I couldn't have said it better!

Cheers!

Unknown said...
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Anonymous said...

Could you be loved?

Do you have anything to offer?

Do you have love to give?

Are you capable of sharing or is it all about you?

Who are these "They" who accost you about your so-called selfishness, or are you being a tad bit delusional, maybe even envious.

I love my so-called dull life. I love my children and I love my husband. Most of all I love being called mother.

I do not envy you at all, you come off as being very lonely and sad.

Anonymously yours, said...

anonymous,

You don't need to defend your choices to me, just as I would not apologize to you for the lifestyle that I have chosen for myself.

If you're happily married, great!

And my oh my, aren't you just a touch presumptuous.

Anonymously yours, said...

Hans, I'm not interested in ever settling down. I'm not "marriage material" and I know that about myself. It's annoying to me when married people assume that I must be shopping for a husband. Why do they, YES, THEY, think that I would be?

Anonymous said...

Is your life really your choice?

If it is then I ask again why slam thoseon the other side of the spectrum with words like envy and dull. Honey there is nothing dull about my life and there is much to envy. I have love all around me, you on the other hand, recently enjoyed your own company in Florida. How sad.

Enjoy yourself, I don't believe anyone else can.

Anonymously yours, said...

You sound awfully bitter.

Unknown said...

I love how some people take 'exceptions' to the rule and try to apply it as the replacement to the 'generalities' that everyone is commenting on.

Of course there are exceptions people . . .

And generally speaking, married people are miserable with at least one partner that they admit to. And single people are miserable with multiple partners that they lie about.

Happy Father's Day!

Unknown said...
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Anonymously yours, said...

Well put, Metin!

Hans, I made the mistake of getting married once, as you said. I don't need to go down that path again!

Anonymously yours, said...

anonymous could not help herself and left this comment for me:

"Do I sound bitter. LOL O.K."

"Please do not look in the mirror, I would not want you to hate your sad self any more than you already do."

I had orginally deleted this anger-spewing person's comment but it shows her charcater.

You must be a great role model for your children. God help them.

Anonymously yours, said...

"anonymous" also felt compelled to leave this comment for me as well:

"Hans, I made the mistake of getting married once, as you said. I don't need to go down that path again!"

"Who would marry you anyway!"

What a mature comment! No, she doesn't feel bitter at all. Grow up and be a mature woman, if that's possible.

I won't be deleting your comments in the future as you exhibit the freak you are. Get a life.

And again, may God help your kids and husband. Do you have friends?

Anonymous said...

I had orginally deleted this anger-spewing person's comment but it shows her charcater

LOL everthing post on your blog is full of anger. Wake up old girl!

You must be a great role model for your children

Yes I am! I would hate to meet your role models.
Do the world a favor darlin Please do not have any children. There is something not right with you- you are delusional.

I won't be deleting your comments in the future as you exhibit the freak you are. Get a life.

Yes you will. The freak part honey is amusing since the only reason I visit your blog is because you're a freak. A sad one at that. I feel so sad for you. I really do.

Answer the question Who or what would marry you?

Unknown said...
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Anonymously yours, said...

Thanks, Hans! I'm busy this weekend. How's next weekend sound to you??

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

can i come to the wedding . . . with my shotgun?

Anonymously yours, said...

Which one of us are you planning to take out first?

Unknown said...

i'll play russian roulette, but with a turkish flavor.

there will only be one missing bullet in the chamber instead of the usual one bullet in the chamber.

but not to worry, i am a lousy shot.

Anonymously yours, said...

Well, that's comforting(??)

Anonymous said...

Hi
Fair enough if your happy to be a 41 year old (going on 42) and live like a player, but ultimately do you not want to be wth some one? and im refering to some bimbo who will want you for a time for your money? then when she has had enough she will move onto her next victim...catch 22 don't you think?

Anonymous said...

Okay , Okay old man just take a chill pill!
What i don't understand is, your trying to remain a player (depends whether you look 25 or actually 42!)with turkish women i take it?
Fair enough you don't wish to settle down but isn't this just typical of our culture? if a woman was to say that she would be considered strange in that her bilogical clock is ticking etc...not of all us want kids! but because we come from family orientated cultures it would be seen as 'odd'.
since i have announced to my folks that i will be leaving home and since i have started travelling with my friends i no longer feel the need to want to get married as there is a whole new world out there! But at the same token i don't like the idea of bed hoping either...but as i said it's one thing for a man to have that view and another for a woman. Either way enjoy, live for the day!!

Anonymous said...

So you think your like Peter pan?.....well im not so sure thats so appealing to the opposite sex when a mature man of 41 (going on 42) likens him self to a child hood hero Peter Pan?

Get a grip! were all getting older, not younger and after all that playing around surely you'd like to settle down with a decent woman who loves you for you and not your money? this i also true for women.

I know they say spice is the varierty of life...but too much and you get burnt if you kwow what i mean.

Szilvia said...

Hi! I am 36 year old "girl" (dressing and behaving and thinking as a 20 yr old) and until recently I did not know what is wrong with me. I always felt that I somehow do not fit into the real adult world, took everything more sensitively, childishly than others. These last months it caused some conflicts with my boss, and recently lost a friend, so these made me realize again that something is utterly wrong.
Now I found the reasons, and will have to try to change my views on the world, lose that Neverland and face reality.

I totally understand you. But sometimes we just need to try to see ourselves in the light of reality. A a lot of times when you think that the wold is wrong - well it just might be a sign of you being wrong.

It is hard process.
Try to be happy, while learning about your true self.
Accept the fact that you are the only individual responsible for yourself. You have to like yourself, and then others will like you, and you will like them in return.

And being an adult does not mean that you will grow boring and unplayful. That you will never lose!!!

Anonymously yours, said...

The truth of the matter is that in the past year I have been happily involved with someone that I care for deeply. We are making plans for the future but that does NOT include marriage. Can I be a "grown up" without making that committment?

Anonymous said...

Hi
It's individual preference- some say getting married is not worth it as it's a mere piece of paper that binds two people together, whilst others think otherwise.
If you and your partner are ok with that fact, then go for it!
Im going on 35 and love partying with friends, going on holidays with my friends, etc and have no inclination of having kiddies- some view that as odd seen as i come from a family orientated back ground. Id love to get married though- so that i can take care of 'my man!'. You see, although i love having fun, im no bed hopper and would like to have fun with a person in all manner of ways. You will know when you meet the right person for sharing your bank account/assets with this individual will not seem an issue- otherwise if it is sign a prenap!